Guide to a Groom’s Responsibilities

GETTING a ‘yes’ from your bride-to-be is a huge relief. But planning the proposal and finding the perfect engagement ring is only the beginning. A groom has a ton of responsibilities ahead.

We’ve got the ultimate guide, so you don’t miss a trick:

Before The Wedding

During the planning stages it’s best if you can do it as a team effort. But there are certain tasks that traditionally fall to the groom.

  • The budget is always the first thing to be decided when planning a wedding. It’s something for both of you to deal with. Though you’ll want to handle communications surrounding any contributions of money offered from your side of the family.
  • The bar and the music are usually tasks for a groom, but if you’re not that bothered about music you might want to swap this one out for something you do feel passionate about. Take the initiative with the things you’re good at organizing.
  • Choose your best man - an important task. If it’s too hard to pick just one, by all means pick two. It’s your day.
  • Select your groomsmen. The group should be close friends you can count on to be helpful on the day. You can also consider your other half’s brothers who will be delighted to be included. It should win brownie points with the in-laws too.
  • Make your wishes for the bachelor party known. Yes, it’s the best man’s job, but he’ll be glad of a steer on what kind of bash you’d like.
  • Round up everyone’s measurements so that you can order the suits for the wedding. Go for fittings well in advance so you’ve got the choice of suits and sizes – this is especially important if you’re getting married in peak wedding season.
  • You should find gifts for your best man and groomsmen to hand out on the day. Find something personal if you can, to show your gratitude for their involvement and support, rather than the same gift for all.
  • Once you and your partner choose wedding rings, you’ll need to keep them safe until the wedding day when you’ll entrust your best man with them. Make sure you add them to your insurance along with the engagement ring.
  • Choose a wedding gift for your bride. Jewelry is customary, such as a necklace or a bracelet, though not compulsory.
  • Organize your marriage license. The rules differ greatly between states, so make sure you read up on what’s needed well in advance.
  • Start making notes for your speech in advance. Closer to the time, write it and learn it! If you’re not a confident public speaker, keep it short. As long as you compliment the bride and thank the bridesmaids and your guests, you’re winning.
  • Arrange transportation for the wedding party from the ceremony to the reception if it’s needed.
  • Be a support for your partner in whatever way necessary and show interest in all decisions.


On The Wedding Day

  • Treat your groomsmen to a fun activity in the morning – perhaps a round of golf or brunch, or anything you can do in a larger group. You might consider inviting your father-in-law and any other close family members as well as your wedding party.
  • Use the time in the morning to hand out gifts to the best man and groomsmen.
  • Practice your speech – all eyes will be on you, so you’ll want to get it right. Make sure your notes are safely tucked in your jacket pocket. Even if you have practiced the lines one thousand times, nothing can prepare you for the moment you finally deliver it and, in the event, you lose your thread, the notes will save you. 
  • Ensure everyone knows their jobs for the day and that they are clear on timings – and that they get ready on time.
  • Hand over the weddings rings to your best man who will present them to you during the ceremony. 


After The Wedding

  • Make sure all the formalwear is returned.
  • If you have taken on the task of organizing the honeymoon, you should take the lead on logistics and practicalities of getting to the airport on time and having the correct documents for travel.
  • When you get home from your honeymoon, split the mammoth task of writing thank you notes to your guests with your wife. Yes, it might take you several sittings, but a few personal words of thanks will go a very long way to your family and friends.



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